📌 Bathing with Kids: Japan vs. Vietnam

Japanese people have a habit of bathing with their children, while in Vietnam, parents usually bathe their children but don’t bathe together. This is one of the biggest cultural differences I noticed when I first moved to Japan. It really reflects how intimacy and privacy are viewed differently in each country.

In Japan, bathing together isn’t just a habit—it’s seen as a way for parents and children to bond. Meanwhile, in Vietnam, parents see bathing their kids as more of a responsibility, focusing on hygiene rather than a chance to spend time together. This difference comes from various factors like daily routines, cultural habits, and different ideas about privacy.

At first, I found it pretty strange. Bathing together with a baby isn’t unusual, but once kids grow older—around three years old or more—they start to become more aware of their surroundings. In Vietnam, parents usually bathe their children first and then take their own shower separately. But in Japan, parents still bathe with their young children. Fathers can bathe with their daughters, and mothers can bathe with their sons. Even as kids grow up, many still go to public baths with their parents.

This comes from Japan’s strong communal bathing culture. People are used to going to sento (public bathhouses) or onsen (hot springs), where everyone bathes together without clothes. So for Japanese people, bathing with family members is totally normal. In Vietnam, though, exposing your body in front of others—even within the family—feels uncomfortable for many, especially for older generations like mine, born in the 1980s, and those before me. Traditional values have shaped how privacy is seen in Vietnamese families.

When I first moved to Japan, I had my first onsen experience with my father-in-law. Honestly, it was super awkward. I was standing in a completely unfamiliar place, having to take off all my clothes in front of someone else—especially a family member. I was so uncomfortable and kept trying to cover myself, but in the end, I had no choice but to go with it. After a few times, I got used to it and realized it wasn’t a big deal. In Japan, public baths allow kids under six to enter the opposite-gender area, meaning boys can bathe in the women’s section with their mothers, and girls can bathe in the men’s section with their fathers. But once they turn six, they have to follow the gender-specific bath rules.

Another big difference is the way bathrooms are designed. Most Japanese homes have bathtubs, whereas in Vietnam, standing showers are more common. Bathrooms and toilets are also separate in Japan, which makes the bathing area more convenient to use. In Vietnam, where bathrooms are often combined, quick showers are the norm to save water and time. I still remember my mom telling me, "Don’t waste water!" and "Don’t shower too long, you’ll catch a cold!" So, growing up, I always took fast showers. But in Japan, bathing is seen as a way to relax and unwind, with bath time often lasting at least 30 minutes.

So, does Japanese bathing waste a lot of water? Well, yes, it does use more water and energy than quick showers in Vietnam. But Japanese people have smart ways to save water. Before getting into the tub, everyone washes their hair and body thoroughly. Then, the water in the tub is reused by other family members instead of being drained immediately. So while it does use more water than Vietnam’s quick showers, it’s not wasted carelessly. At first, I thought it was strange, but after getting used to it, it made sense. After soaking in the tub, I would rinse off again to feel completely clean. So for Japanese people, bathtubs are not just for hygiene—they’re part of a daily self-care routine.

Japanese bathtubs are also pretty advanced. They have automatic temperature control, and the water is heated with gas, not electricity. Some homes even have built-in ventilation and heating in the bathroom. In Vietnam, these features are usually found in premium hotels and resorts or luxury spas, but in Japan, they’re standard. Bathtubs are mainly used in autumn, winter, or on cold days, but a lot of Japanese people take hot baths year-round, keeping the temperature between 39-41°C. Personally, I love this because I don’t like cold showers at all.

For me, bathing with my child is a great way for us to bond. After a long day, aside from eating meals together, bath time is when we get to talk and play. My kid loves bringing a bunch of toys into the tub—dinosaurs, glowing marbles, or little insect figures. Once we’re done cleaning ourselves, it turns into a fun water battle. Of course, as a parent, you always have to "lose" so your kid can enjoy the game more. In Japan, bath time is playtime, not just about getting clean. In Vietnam, though, bath time is more straightforward—get in, wash up, and get out.

If you have a bathtub at home, I think Vietnamese parents should try bathing with their kids. It’s not just about getting clean—it helps kids feel relaxed, gives parents a chance to connect with them, and makes bath time fun. Plus, it helps kids learn to be independent in taking care of their hygiene, like washing their own hair or rinsing properly. It’s a small but meaningful way to bond as a family. Would you like to try this with your child?

Modern Japanese bathroom featuring a sleek design, with an advanced bathtub that includes automatic temperature control and gas heating. - Photo: Internet

📌 This article was written by Bean JP.

💬 What do you think about this cultural difference? Leave a comment below and let’s chat! 😊

Bathing with Kids: Cultural Differences Between Japan & Vietnam

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